My first blog

So this is my first blog o_0


I will start by telling you a little about myself and what i hope to blog about. Well i am a 24 year old female diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. In November 2009 just after my 22nd birthday i was sectioned under the mental health act. I spent 6 months on a NHS psychiatric intensive care unit before being transferred to a private hospital and being placed in a specialist personality disorder unit. I spent 18 months there and hated it, it was well and truely hellish. I was discharged on my 24th birthday some 2 years after being sectioned.
I must admit though, before hospital my life was a chaotic mess. i was away from home studying at university for a psychology degree and my life consisted of alcohol, cannabis, repeated admissions to A&E for self harm and cherished visits to my CPN. I suppose things got too much, i became seriously over attached to my CPN and fell in love with her in a way. I wanted to be rescued by her, things were just too bad and i couldn't control my emotions. Everyday i wanted to die i hated myself so much, yet on the surface to most people i was "normal". I kept a journal in the couple of months leading to my detention. My friend admitted to reading it when i asked her to bring it in to hospital. She stated that she had no idea that is how i felt and was scared by the things i had written. This journal got "lost" somewhere in hospital which I'm absolutely gutted about.
Hospital was a nightmare but i will blog about that another time. I have changed since hospital. For the better and worse. Anyhow i hope to blog about my past experiences of BPD, hospital, the present and what i hope for the future. I hope you enjoy reading and that i am not too boring. Whether you are a BPD suffer, a person with other mental health problems or a lucky sod who falls in the realms of "normality" i hope that you will gain something from my blog and the bad (and good) things I've been through.


thanks for reading
brokenmind_


x